Five Boys Meet Four Tubbies
by UnstableUniverses
Summary: A bus crash leads the members in One Direction to a new world, a world inhabited by Teletubbies. This place is good, but will the bandmates ever get back home? Written for the Unstable Universes Podcast.


Louis plopped down on the tour bus couch and handed Harry a beer. Harry took it and with a cheerful albeit exhausted "Thanks, mate." The adrenaline of performing was subsiding as the tour bus started to rumble below them, they're on their way to the next venue.

"Jolly good show, lads," said Niall, "I believe that may have been our greatest show to date!"

"I can't wait to get off this thing and into my own bed," complained Zayne. He wasn't sure about how much more of this 'touring with four other wankers' thing he could take.

"I won't hear any of that, Z" shouted Harry as he finished hooking the controllers to the Nintendo64, "No negativity tonight, lads! Just a beer and a game, innit."

With a road-weary cheers, the boys took turns going head-to-head in Mario Kart 64. The bus driver and manager, Simon Cowell, looked at the rearview mirror as he drove. "Off to bed now, boys. Must have your voices fresh and your feet ready to dance for tomorrow's big finale!" The television personality and newly licensed driver nodded as he heard a chorus of "Yes, Simon" and the sounds of the five twentysomethings climbing into their bunks. They would have to drive through the night to make it to their finale show at Wembley Arena the following afternoon. It would be a long night, but it was necessary.

Simon took a sip of his cuppa, hoping the trace amounts of caffeine would be enough, he didn't have the palette for coffee. Utterly delicious, Simon guzzled the whole thing down, before he noticed, to his horror, that the tea wasn't the orange pekoe he thought he'd made, but rather it was sleepytime tea! "Must… Keep… Going…" Simon muttered to himself as he began to doze, giving in to the fatigue that sleepytime tea induces.

The bus swayed left and right, Simon fast asleep. The weight of his foot pressed the accelerator down further and further. The bus sped down the thankfully empty motorway, drifting between lanes, until finally the vehicle holding such precious cargo made a sharp turn to the right, careening off the road and off of the White Cliffs of Dover. The bus fell, gaining yet more speed until the inevitable and horrendous crash at the bottom.

The four British and one Irish singers awoke to a strange peaceful silence. There were no growls of the engine as the bus travelled, no music playing, not even any birds chirping. Liam was the first to notice the complete lack of sound, but when he opened his mouth to speak, nothing came out. Panicked that he would be unable to sing for the final show, Liam looked around him. The bus was not as it should be. Objects were scattered across, not the floor, but the ceiling! _Is the bus upside down?_ He realized to his horror. But in a moment of fear, when his heart should be pounding out of his chest, it laid still. _Am I… Are we..?_ He looked closer at the mess on the ceiling of the bus. It wasn't just blankets and pillows, the bodies of all five members of One Direction were laying crumpled and unmoving in a mass.

Around him, his friends began to fade into view. First Niall, then Zayne, followed by Louis, and finally Harry. Liam gestured to their surroundings, pointing out the horrifying scene that laid in front of them, still unable to make coherent words.

Niall was the first to notice movement up towards the front of the bus, a flash of red, then purple, then green, then yellow light streamed in through the shattered windshield. He went running toward the lights, the four others followed.

Standing in front of the inverted bus were four massive beings, at least seven feet tall. Built generally like humans, but with coloured fur adorning their entire bodies, strange glowing screens in their bellies, and antennae-like protrusions from the tops of their heads. From their backs grew massive wings, matching the colours of their fur.

The One Direction boys each stepped out of the bus, trying to ignore the broken body of Simon sitting in the driver seat. They stood in awe of the four creatures, surely not of this world, but somehow familiar.

Looking around, they realize they were no longer in jolly old England, but in some strange place. Much like the beings, familiar but alien. A landscape of rolling green hills surrounded them, populated by trees and bushes. Many rabbits hopped between the greenery, munching on grass. Above them, a baby face watched down from within the sun.

Harry wanted to scream. There was no way they could be dead. There was no way this was Heaven. It wasn't fair! They only had one show left on the tour, they'd be letting their fans down!

The purple one knowingly placed a hand on his shoulder and, mouth barely moving, he heard a soft "Tinky-Winky." Comforted, he looked at the beings hand, then to his shoulder, then behind him. _Gadzooks_ , Harry thought, _there are wings back there!_ As he noticed his new appendages, the sprung to life, reaching out to their full breadth.

The other four boys easily took notice of the grand new realization, and each spread their own wings. And with their wings came their voices.

"Please, Great Ones, we only had one show left, is there any way we may go back just this once?" pleaded Louis.

The green being responded with a sorrowful "Dipsy" as it shook its massive head no.

"I'll be damned! Our fans deserve it more than anyone else! You can make this one exception for a gang of talented young lads, can't you?" Harry chided.

The smallest of the group, though still massive, nodded its red head "Po."

With that, Niall, Louis, Liam, and Harry took flight for the first time, clumsy perhaps, but it came naturally to the boys. Zayne, however, struggled to leave the ground.

"Go without me, fellows," he yelled. "I wanted a solo career anyway!"

And so the four boys flew up and up and up until they reached the baby face in the sky. With a nod and a giggle, it opened its gigantic mouth and the boys flew in. It was dark for a moment, then all of a sudden they were in the greenroom at the Wembley Arena. They looked behind them, they still had their wings.

"If this doesn't make TMZ, I don't know what will." Exclaimed Liam as they headed out on to the stage.


End file.
